PRE-MARRITAL SEX AND THE BIBLE.

PRE-MARRITAL SEX AND THE BIBLE.

Dr. Benson Omole.
Aren’t you bothered with these questions?

a. Premarital sex – why are Christians so strongly against it?
b. What is an appropriate level of physical intimacy before marriage?
c. Why is sexual purity so important?
d. Is abstinence before marriage a realistic teaching?
e. Is it okay to have premarital sex if you know you are going to marry him/her?
f. Does the Bible say anything about sex before marriage? 

It will interest you to know that the Bible condemns all sexual sins, before marriage, and after marriage: 

a. Adultery is a consensual sex between a married person and someone other than his or her spouse. Read: 
i) "...Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; He who does so destroys his own soul..." Proverbs 6:32; 
ii) "...Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body..." 1 Corinthians 6:18 and 
iii) "...Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge..." Hebrews 13:4.

 b. Fornication is all forms of sexual immorality in general. These are specified in the Bible: 
I) "...For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies..." Matthew 15:19.
ii) "...being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers,..." Romans 1:29; 
iii) "...It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles—that a man has his father’s wife!" 1 Corinthians 5:1. 

Sex before marriage, commonly defined as a premarital sex, is not addressed in that exact term, but it does fall within the scope of sexual immorality!

The Bible teaches that sex before marriage is immoral in a couple of different passages: 
I) "...But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.” 1 Corinthians 7:2.
In the verse above, marriage is presented as the “cure” for sexual immorality. 
Sexual union within marriage, which is commended, is set against sexual immorality, which is to be avoided by all Humans. 
Any sex outside of marriage is considered immoral. This would have to include premarital sex!

There is another verse that presents sex before marriage as immoral: 
“...Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Hebrews 13:4 
Here, we have both adultery and fornication contrasted with what happens in the marriage bed. Sexual intimacy among married Couple is honorable, solely. Therefore all other types of sexual intimacy, and relationship are condemned as immoral and these will bring God’s judgment, on the day of Judgement.

Based on these passages, the biblical definition of sexual immorality would have to include premarital intimacy, which is sex before marriage. 
Therefore, all the Bible verses that condemn sexual immorality in general also condemn sex before marriage. These include: 
a. "…but that we write to them to abstain from things polluted by idols, from sexual immorality, from things strangled, and from blood…” Acts 15:20; 
b. “…Foods for the stomach and the stomach for foods, but God will destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body…” 1Cor. 6:13.
c  “…Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body…” 1 Cor. 6:18.
d. “…Nor let us commit sexual immorality, as some of them did, and in one day twenty-three thousand fell…” 1 Corinthians 10:8; 
e. “…lest, when I come again, my God will humble me among you, and I shall mourn for many who have sinned before and have not repented of the uncleanness, fornication, and lewdness which they have practiced…”  2 Corinthians 12:21; 
f. “…Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness,…” Galatians 5:19; 
g. “…But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints;…” Ephesians 5:3; 
h. “…Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry…” Colossians 3:5; 
i. “…For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality;…” 1 Thessalonians 4:3; 
j. “…as Sodom and Gomorrah, and the cities around them in a similar manner to these, having given themselves over to sexual immorality and gone after strange flesh, are set forth as an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire…” Jude 1:7; and 
k. “…But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death…" Revelation 21:8.

God designed sexual intimacy for the marriage, and the Bible honors marriage. 
One of the ways to honour marriage is to abstain from any form of sexual immorality, before the consummation of the marriage. When two unmarried people engage in sexual immorality, they sinned against God, and they are miss-using God’s good gift of sex. Before marriage, a couple has no binding union, and they’ve entered no known sacred covenant; without the marriage vows, they have no right to exploit the culmination of such vows.

Too often, we see sex as a “recreation” only, forgetting to recognize that there is another aspect to it—“procreation”. Sex within marriage is pleasurable, and God designed it to be enjoyable. God wants men and women to enjoy sexual activity within the confines and boundary of their marriage. 
However, God’s intention for sex intimacy includes bringing forth children. Thus, for a couple to engage in sex before marriage is doubly wrong—they are enjoying pleasures not intended for them, and secondly they are taking a chance of creating a human life outside of the family structure which God intended for every child.
We must acknowledge that culture does not determine right from wrong. Likewise modernization does not determine human conducts:
a. “…O LORD, I know the way of man is not in himself; It is not in man who walks to direct his own steps." Jeremiah 10:23.
b. “…The preparations of the heart belong to man, But the answer of the tongue is from the LORD…A man's heart plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps." Proverbs 16:1, 9.
c. “…A man's steps are of the LORD; How then can a man understand his own way?" Proverbs 20:24.

Following the command, and the instructions of God, concerning sex before marriage, would greatly benefit our society. If the Bible’s message on sex before marriage were obeyed, there would be far fewer sexually transmitted diseases, far fewer single motherhood, far fewer abortions, far fewer unwed mothers and unwanted pregnancies, and far fewer children growing up without both parents in their lives. 
Abstinence saves lives, protects babies, gives sexual relations their proper value, and, most importantly, honors God. Sex between a husband and wife is the only form of sexual intimacy of which God approves. 
Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul; 1 Peter 2:11.

Thanks for reading.

(This work is under the oversight of Elders of The Church of Christ, Ekute Quarters P. O. Box 1656 Ado Ekiti. Contacts: +234-806-006-6660; +234-707-002-0042; or omolebenson@gmail.com; benoomole@gmail.com;)

Comments

  1. Anonymous29 January 2026 at 23:16

    Thanks sir for the teaching,but I want to ask if someone has in one way or the other involve himself in this sexual immorality and later abstain from it and also prayed would there still be punishment for such person

    ReplyDelete
  2. biblespeaks30 January 2026 at 02:58

    Thanks so much for the response:

    One brief verse of scripture in the life Of Samson contains a powerful sermonette on the effects of sin: "But the Philistines took him, and put out his eyes, and brought him down to Gaza, and bound him with fetters of brass; and he did grind in the prison house" (judges 16:21).

    Here we see
    (1) the blinding effects of sin;
    (2) the binding effects of sin; and
    (3) the grinding effects of sin.
    Today, sin has these same effects. Consider the following carefully.

    Sin's Blinding Effects

    Over 30,000 people (90 per cent adults) go blind each year in the U.S. and Canada for various reasons. How sad to see one who is physically blind. But a much sadder picture is that of one who is spiritually blind Spiritual blindness in the Bible was ascribed to the watchmen who failed (Isa. 56: 10); to the deceitful false teachers like the Pharisees (Matt. 15:14); and to those who willfully reject the truth (2 Cor. 4: 4). Today, spiritual blindness can be attributed to these and many more things, ranging from prejudice to tradition.

    Sin's Binding Effects

    That sin enslaves is made clear by the statement of Paul in Romans 6:16 where he states that one becomes a "servant" (slave) of sin by yielding to it. The Galatians had been "in bondage under the elements of the world" (Gal. 4:3). Even the worst of sinners would not deny that sin enslaves. It stifles noble impulses and leads men into captivity. It corrupts the affections and paralyzes the will. The bondage of sin is seen in the drunkard who says he cannot quit, the dope addict, the fornicator who knows he is doing wrong but continues in his sin. When a person admits that he is doing wrong but refuses to repent, he is a slave to sin.

    Sin's Grinding Effects

    Just as a large round grindstone becomes smaller and smaller as it is used to grind tools, man becomes smaller and smaller by sin. One definition of grinding is "to wear down" (Webster). The burden of sin becomes so heavy that it wears one down to the lowest state. Sin will grind a husband or wife into a cheater; a truthful man into a liar; a zealous Christian into a lazy one, etc. The stream, the fire and the storm leave their marks on the landscape. In like manner, sin, as it courses its way through one's life, grinds one down to the lowest possible state moral , social , and physically.

    When we ponder these threefold effects of sin, it ought to cause us to take inventory of our own lives. No doubt we will realize that sin has its effect upon us as it did upon Samson of old.

    When man cries out for deliverance from the bondage of sin, God answers by providing for us a Savior (Matt. 1: 2 1). From the threefold effects of sin, He offers a threefold salvation.
    From its blinding effect, God offers the light of the gospel and Jesus Christ, the Light of the world (Psa. 119:105; John 8:12).
    From sin's binding effect, Jesus provides the truth which He said will "make you free" (John 8:32).
    From sin's grinding effects, God offers forgiveness. Obedience is the condition (Rom. 6:17-18).
    When one obeys "that form of doctrine" he is free from sin; its power, its stain, its guilt.

    Thanks for reading.

    ReplyDelete

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